life is pretty manageable here in the US. we can meet someone, fall in love, get married, get an apartment, have a child, settle into new situations, adjust to jobs, life just moves along at pace.
then tragedy hits. a 20-yr-old kid walks into Sandy Hook Elementary and massacres 26 people. each one is a precious face; an individual human being; someone's child, sister, cousin, friend; most are children.
unimaginable grief.
senseless pain.
deep evil.
confused disbelief.
shock.
where can we turn?
what's the next step?
what does the Bible say about losing a child?
3 accounts of a parent losing a child stand out to me in the Bible:
FIRST, we have King David, the 'man after God's own heart.'
he desired God as his #1. it didn't mean he was perfect. after all, he lusted after someone else's wife and had that guy killed so he could get her, just to name one of his most glaring sins! but he repented, and that made all the difference to God.
David still had to live with the consequences of sin, however. we see in 2 Samuel 12 that his baby, born to that other man's wife, became seriously ill. David spent a whole week fasting and praying for his sick baby, stricken with grief and hope and fear and dismay, but his child died.
gut-wrenching.
painful.
his servants didn't even want to tell him the news, for fear that he would 'do something desperate.' v. 18.
that's what we want to do when tragedy strikes: something desperate. we want to get justice by our own hands, we want to yell, scream, express ourselves, cry, find God and ask Him questions. some desperate options are good, some not so good.
what did David do?
"Then David got up from the ground. After he had washed, put on lotions and changed his clothes, he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. Then he went to his own house, and at his request they served him food, and he ate... Then David comforted his wife Bathsheba." 2 Samuel 12:20
David got up from the ground. he had been laying, kneeling, begging, groveling, all things devastatingly low. but then he got up. basic things first - manage to somehow get up.
he washed, put on lotions and changed his clothes. he did something normal, something daily... took a shower, shaved, put on a favorite cologne... it didn't mean he didn't care anymore, it just meant he had to keep on living.
he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. worshiped? you ask. how could he worship? God didn't do anything! God presided over the death!! but yes, David worshiped God, no matter how he felt. David acknowledged that he wasn't God; God is God. whether it seems like it or not, God is in charge, and He is the author of everything good. He is watching, He does care, and He is also saddened and angered by evil. worship frees us, and it energizes us, because it gives control back to God. it refreshes us and restores us as we claim that God is sovereign and we submit.
then he went to his own house... and he ate. he survived. i've heard that parents (and others) might feel guilty for living when their child dies. they feel that they failed at their job. but, to anyone in Newtown, who might feel like that, you DIDN'T fail, you are NOT guilty. it is GOOD that you survived. if David could make it through, even though he really WAS guilty of causing his son's death, you can make it too.
then David comforted his wife. once he had been filled up with God's restoration, and had done some basic human functions to feed his body and spirit, he was able to pour out comfort on his wife.
SECOND, we have Job, tested by Satan on his commitment to God.
what was his story?
Job 1:1 tells us that he was "blameless and upright; he feared God and shunned evil." this was a wealthy and very blessed guy: he had loads of land, sheep, camels, oxen, donkeys, servants, and most precious, a big family - a wife and 10 kids!
the bummer? he lived on earth, where Satan is allowed to disrupt and cause bad things to happen. Satan personally went to God and challenged Him, saying that the only reason Job was so faithful to God was that he was so blessed. true that it's easier to praise God when things are going well, so God decided to let Satan test Job.
in one disastrous day, Job lost all of his possessions to raiding armies and a lightning strike. but most terribly of all, a tornado destroyed the house where his children were and they all died!
now, Job wasn't aware of God's conversation with Satan. all he knew is that he lost every single thing that he had in one day. all he knew was the disaster, and he also knew he hadn't done anything to deserve it.
what did Job do?
"At this Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship and said:
'Naked I came from the womb,
and naked I will depart.
The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away;
may the name of the Lord be praised.'
In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing." Job 1:20-22
Job... tore his robe and shaved his head. he grieved fully. he was completely in a deep well of despair. he faced the horror and wallowed in it. it's good to grieve. if you read more of Job, you'll realize the extent of his grief: anger, frustration, despair, despondency, aching pain, confusion, doubt, and more. this didn't mean he needed medication or 'treatment,' as psychologists and doctors say these days. it meant he was going through the natural grieving process.
then he fell to the ground in worship. again with the worshiping. these are God's men... and they worship. he told it how it was, and then praised God for being God. and as the last verse says, maybe for our benefit as readers, what he said was not sinful.
THIRD, we have the most incredible one, the whole culmination of the Bible: God the Father, who voluntarily allowed His only Son die on behalf of everyone on the planet.
there's a lot of talk about the heroes who have emerged from the terrible story at Newtown, Connecticut. and they were definitely heroes. they were teachers who led children to safety and locked the doors and covered young ones with their own bodies. they were children who comforted their friends and stayed quiet in the terrorizing chaos and led an escape out the door right past the terrorizer.
Jesus was the original hero who gave His life for others. and also heroic, His Father had to let it happen to bring salvation to us.
God let His Son be raised by mere humans,
allowed Him to be ridiculed and beaten,
and after enduring an unfair trial full of false accusations and bribery,
He was forced to look the other way as His precious, perfect Son clothed Himself with OUR despicable sins and took our punishment of death.
Jesus cried out to Him in total anguish, and though God could have called the whole thing off, He didn't, for our sakes. He knew the future - that because of Jesus' perfection, He would be raised again to live forever.
God understands pain. He chose to go through it to save you and me. He chose to go through it so that when we experience death, we can look forward to LIFE after death, if we know Jesus.
we turn to what the Bible says because it lets us know we're not alone. God wasn't missing during David's time, or Job's time, or now in your time. and He understands what you're going through.
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose...
"If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all.... Christ Jesus, who died -- more than that, who was raised to life -- is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:
neither angels nor demons,
neither the present nor the future,
nor any powers,
neither height nor depth,
nor anything else in all creation,
will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Romans 8:28, 31b-32, 34b-39
"The salvation of the righteous comes from the Lord;
He is their stronghold in time of trouble."
Psalm 37:39
do you need a stronghold? if you know Jesus, take refuge in Him and worship Him. if you don't know Jesus, please search Him out. try Him and see for yourself if He proves to be who He says He is.
then tragedy hits. a 20-yr-old kid walks into Sandy Hook Elementary and massacres 26 people. each one is a precious face; an individual human being; someone's child, sister, cousin, friend; most are children.
unimaginable grief.
senseless pain.
deep evil.
confused disbelief.
shock.
where can we turn?
what's the next step?
what does the Bible say about losing a child?
3 accounts of a parent losing a child stand out to me in the Bible:
FIRST, we have King David, the 'man after God's own heart.'
he desired God as his #1. it didn't mean he was perfect. after all, he lusted after someone else's wife and had that guy killed so he could get her, just to name one of his most glaring sins! but he repented, and that made all the difference to God.
David still had to live with the consequences of sin, however. we see in 2 Samuel 12 that his baby, born to that other man's wife, became seriously ill. David spent a whole week fasting and praying for his sick baby, stricken with grief and hope and fear and dismay, but his child died.
gut-wrenching.
painful.
his servants didn't even want to tell him the news, for fear that he would 'do something desperate.' v. 18.
that's what we want to do when tragedy strikes: something desperate. we want to get justice by our own hands, we want to yell, scream, express ourselves, cry, find God and ask Him questions. some desperate options are good, some not so good.
what did David do?
"Then David got up from the ground. After he had washed, put on lotions and changed his clothes, he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. Then he went to his own house, and at his request they served him food, and he ate... Then David comforted his wife Bathsheba." 2 Samuel 12:20
David got up from the ground. he had been laying, kneeling, begging, groveling, all things devastatingly low. but then he got up. basic things first - manage to somehow get up.
he washed, put on lotions and changed his clothes. he did something normal, something daily... took a shower, shaved, put on a favorite cologne... it didn't mean he didn't care anymore, it just meant he had to keep on living.
he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. worshiped? you ask. how could he worship? God didn't do anything! God presided over the death!! but yes, David worshiped God, no matter how he felt. David acknowledged that he wasn't God; God is God. whether it seems like it or not, God is in charge, and He is the author of everything good. He is watching, He does care, and He is also saddened and angered by evil. worship frees us, and it energizes us, because it gives control back to God. it refreshes us and restores us as we claim that God is sovereign and we submit.
then he went to his own house... and he ate. he survived. i've heard that parents (and others) might feel guilty for living when their child dies. they feel that they failed at their job. but, to anyone in Newtown, who might feel like that, you DIDN'T fail, you are NOT guilty. it is GOOD that you survived. if David could make it through, even though he really WAS guilty of causing his son's death, you can make it too.
then David comforted his wife. once he had been filled up with God's restoration, and had done some basic human functions to feed his body and spirit, he was able to pour out comfort on his wife.
SECOND, we have Job, tested by Satan on his commitment to God.
what was his story?
Job 1:1 tells us that he was "blameless and upright; he feared God and shunned evil." this was a wealthy and very blessed guy: he had loads of land, sheep, camels, oxen, donkeys, servants, and most precious, a big family - a wife and 10 kids!
the bummer? he lived on earth, where Satan is allowed to disrupt and cause bad things to happen. Satan personally went to God and challenged Him, saying that the only reason Job was so faithful to God was that he was so blessed. true that it's easier to praise God when things are going well, so God decided to let Satan test Job.
in one disastrous day, Job lost all of his possessions to raiding armies and a lightning strike. but most terribly of all, a tornado destroyed the house where his children were and they all died!
now, Job wasn't aware of God's conversation with Satan. all he knew is that he lost every single thing that he had in one day. all he knew was the disaster, and he also knew he hadn't done anything to deserve it.
what did Job do?
"At this Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship and said:
'Naked I came from the womb,
and naked I will depart.
The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away;
may the name of the Lord be praised.'
In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing." Job 1:20-22
Job... tore his robe and shaved his head. he grieved fully. he was completely in a deep well of despair. he faced the horror and wallowed in it. it's good to grieve. if you read more of Job, you'll realize the extent of his grief: anger, frustration, despair, despondency, aching pain, confusion, doubt, and more. this didn't mean he needed medication or 'treatment,' as psychologists and doctors say these days. it meant he was going through the natural grieving process.
then he fell to the ground in worship. again with the worshiping. these are God's men... and they worship. he told it how it was, and then praised God for being God. and as the last verse says, maybe for our benefit as readers, what he said was not sinful.
THIRD, we have the most incredible one, the whole culmination of the Bible: God the Father, who voluntarily allowed His only Son die on behalf of everyone on the planet.
there's a lot of talk about the heroes who have emerged from the terrible story at Newtown, Connecticut. and they were definitely heroes. they were teachers who led children to safety and locked the doors and covered young ones with their own bodies. they were children who comforted their friends and stayed quiet in the terrorizing chaos and led an escape out the door right past the terrorizer.
Jesus was the original hero who gave His life for others. and also heroic, His Father had to let it happen to bring salvation to us.
God let His Son be raised by mere humans,
allowed Him to be ridiculed and beaten,
and after enduring an unfair trial full of false accusations and bribery,
He was forced to look the other way as His precious, perfect Son clothed Himself with OUR despicable sins and took our punishment of death.
Jesus cried out to Him in total anguish, and though God could have called the whole thing off, He didn't, for our sakes. He knew the future - that because of Jesus' perfection, He would be raised again to live forever.
God understands pain. He chose to go through it to save you and me. He chose to go through it so that when we experience death, we can look forward to LIFE after death, if we know Jesus.
we turn to what the Bible says because it lets us know we're not alone. God wasn't missing during David's time, or Job's time, or now in your time. and He understands what you're going through.
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose...
"If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all.... Christ Jesus, who died -- more than that, who was raised to life -- is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:
'For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.'
"No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither life nor death,neither angels nor demons,
neither the present nor the future,
nor any powers,
neither height nor depth,
nor anything else in all creation,
will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Romans 8:28, 31b-32, 34b-39
"The salvation of the righteous comes from the Lord;
He is their stronghold in time of trouble."
Psalm 37:39
do you need a stronghold? if you know Jesus, take refuge in Him and worship Him. if you don't know Jesus, please search Him out. try Him and see for yourself if He proves to be who He says He is.
Nice post. I especially appreciate your charge for those of us who do not know Him to search Him out. Excellent.
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